Broken Angels
by fall into your sunlight
Summary: AU. When tragedy hits, when you're left bruised and broken, when you're feeling abandoned, when you're lost… it's your friends who can help keep you together when you need it most. After all, one is good but four is better. Rated M for Abuse. NO SLASH.
1. Carlos Garcia

**Title: Broken Angels**

**Summary: When tragedy hits, when you're left bruised and broken, when you're feeling abandoned, when you're lost… it's your friends who can help keep you together when you need it most. After all, one is good but four is better.**

**A/N: *if you read all of this, you're awesome and I really love you haha* So first and foremost, exactly half of the credit for this story goes to my best friend Zaneta. She thought up pretty much the entire story with me and helped me plan like everything. I couldn't have done this story without her. Secondly, take a good look at the categories for this; this story is going to be sad. There's a little bit of angst for everyone in this. I apologize if this makes you sad or if you want to banish me to the Palm Woods wishing well. Also, there's no slash in this story, and it's AU and takes place in New York (upon Zaneta's request). And that's it. I really hope you guys enjoy this (:**

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><p><strong>Chapter One: Carlos<strong>

"Carlos Roberto Garcia, if you are not downstairs in two seconds I'm giving your breakfast to the neighbor's dog!" Sylvia Garcia called to her son from downstairs in their kitchen. She turned her attention back to the skillet where she was currently heating up Carlos's eggs for him.

"Here I am mommy!" hearing the pitter-patter of tiny feet rushing down the steps and then running into the kitchen, Sylvia turned to see her six year old son Carlos entering the room. Sylvia turned off the stove and bent down to kiss her son's forehead. "Do I still get my breakfast?" Carlos asked and Sylvia smiled. Whenever he spoke, he revealed the missing tooth from his top row of teeth and she found it simply adorable.

"Of course you do _mijo_." Sylvia said. She scooped the eggs onto his favorite plastic batman plate and placed them onto the table. "Eat up because I don't want you to be late to school."

"Kay." Carlos said and started to shovel his eggs into his mouth. For such a small boy, he had such a big appetite. Sylvia didn't understand how he and his father, Officer Juan Garcia ate so much but she learned early on that the fastest way to a man's heart was through his stomach. "Mommy," Carlos said, his mouth full. "Can't I just stay home today? It's my birfday."

Sylvia smiled and sat down next to him at the table. "I know it's your birthday, but school is important and you've only been there for a few weeks."

"I know." Carlos grumbled. "But I'm six. Six is old enough to not go to school."

Sylvia chuckled. "Sorry _mijo_ but six isn't old enough to skip out on school." Carlos pouted and stuck his tongue out at his mother before returning to his breakfast. Sylvia looked at her watch. "C'mon baby, you've got to get your things now. We're both going to be late."

"Kay." Carlos jumped down from his chair and ran to get his book bag while Sylvia picked up his plate from the table and brought it to the sink. "I'm ready!" Carlos appeared back in the kitchen, his book bag on his back.

"Then let's go!" Sylvia took his tiny hand in hers and walked him outside.

"Can I sit up front today?" Carlos asked, running to the passenger's seat of his mother's car.

"Sorry kid but you know the deal. No front seat until you're old enough to get out of your car seat." Sylvia said and ushered him to the back seat and opened the door for him.

Carlos groaned. "What good is it being six if I still can't do anything?" he whined, climbing into his car seat. Sylvia leaned over and buckled him. "It's like I'm still five."

"Trust me _mijo_, you don't need to be in any hurry to grow up." Sylvia told him and then got into the driver's seat of the car. She started up the car and backed out of the driveway, driving to Carlos's school.

"Mommy, are you going to be home for my birthday party today?" Carlos asked her.

"Of course honey. I wouldn't miss that for the world." Sylvia told him.

Carlos smiled widely. "What's the name of the building where you work again? I can't 'member."

"It's called The World Trade Center sweetie." Sylvia answered, not taking her eyes off of the road but occasionally glancing at Carlos through the rearview mirror. "I'm a business woman."

"Can I work there when I'm big like you?" little Carlos inquired.

"You can do anything you want to do baby." Sylvia told him.

"Can I fly?" Carlos asked excitedly.

Sylvia chuckled. "Sure…in an airplane. Or a helicopter. But human's can't fly with wings like a bird. We weren't made that way."

"Why didn't God make us that way?" Carlos wondered. "Did he love birdies more than us, and that's why we gave them wings?"

"God loves all his creatures equally. He just gave birds wings because they're animals and we aren't. But he made man create airplanes and helicopters so we can try to fly like birds." Sylvia explained.

Carlos considered this. "I still think it would be cool to fly." he said.

Sylvia chuckled again. "Well maybe one day." she told him and then pulled her car into the parking lot of Carlos's school. The six year old quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed out of his car seat, grabbing his book bag, ready to jump out for when Sylvia opened his door. At the early age of six, he found himself loving school and all his friends there. Even if it was his birthday, he knew today was going to be a good day. Sylvia opened his door and helped him out of the car. "Give mama a kiss." she knelt down to his level so Carlos could place a somewhat sticky kiss on her cheek. "Have a great day _mijo_."

"By mommy!" Carlos called over his shoulder as he ran into the school. The bell was ringing just as Carlos stepped inside of his classroom.

"Good morning class." Miss Pierce, his kindergarten teacher said to them as the five and six year olds all rushed into their seats. "Would anyone like to write today's date on the board?" she asked. All fifteen of her students hands shot up in the air and she smiled. "How about… Carlos."

The Latino smiled and got out of his seat, walking up to the front the classroom. He picked up the chalk "What do I write Miss Pierce?" he asked.

"Today's date is September 11th, 2001." Miss Pierce told him and then turned to her class. "Why don't we all help Carlos spell out September." she suggested. "S…E…P…T…"

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><p>"Garcia!"<p>

Officer Juan Garcia looked up from his computer where he was currently typing and saw his partner, Officer Jacob Taylor, rushing into his office. "Where's the fire Taylor?" he asked with a smile.

"The fire's in New York." Jacob said, going over to turn on the TV in Juan's office.

"What do you mean?" Juan turned to the TV screen and felt his heart drop. The news was on and live coverage of what appeared to be an attack on the World Trade Center was being shown. The top of the building had been hit by something and nothing but smoke was filling the air. The reporter was trying to stay calm as he explained what was going on but he lost his façade when a plane flew into view of the camera and flew right into the building a second time. Juan's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. An airplane had just hit the World Trade Center and this was no accident. There was an explosion and more smoke filled the air. The plane had flown right into the middle of the building. "What… in the hell is this?" Juan asked when he regained his voice.

"We don't know." Jacob told him. "We all just saw the footage now and we don't even know what to think of it. It's like nothing we've ever seen before."

Juan turned back to the TV and stared hard at the screen. A moment later he jumped from his seat and grabbed his car keys. "Garcia, where are you going?" Jacob called after him.

Juan turned around just for a moment. "Sylvia works in the World Trade Center."

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><p>Carlos was confused. He didn't know why school let out early, or why his teacher seemed so upset in class. He wanted his daddy right now; he always had the answers. But when he got to his house, neither of his parent's cars were in the driveway. Now he was even more confused. Where were his parents? Grabbing the spare key from under the mat, he unlocked the front door and went inside. "Mommy? Daddy?" he called, walking into the living room. Nobody answered him. Carlos was starting to get worried. Why wasn't his mommy and daddy home? But then he decided not to worry; today was his birthday after all. His parents were probably just outside getting party stuff. Going into the living room, he turned on the TV, wanting to watch cartoons. However, he saw that every single station had the same thing on it. There was something happening but Carlos wasn't sure what. There was a building on fire and smoke was everything. People were running around, screaming and crying. Carlos didn't want to watch this. It was making him sad.<p>

He pressed the button on his remote one more time to change the channel but this time, instead of seeing the scary scene of the smokey building, he saw a picture of his dad. Now Carlos was even more worried and confused. Why was his daddy on the TV with the burning building? He heard a knock on the front door and his first thought was that it was his parents. "Mommy, daddy!" he jumped off of the couch and ran to the front door. But instead of his mom or dad walking inside, it was his daddy's partner Officer Taylor. He was dressed in his police uniform. "Hi Officer Tawyor." Carlos greeted the man.

"Hey Carlos. Can I come in?" he asked, looking rather upset.

Carlos nodded and stepped aside so he could walk inside. "Do you know where my daddy is? I just saw him on TV, but I want him to be home." the little boy said.

That only seemed to upset Officer Taylor further for the frown lines in his forehead creased and his eyes looked mysteriously wet. "Carlos…tonight there was an accident." he started to explain to him. He looked into Carlos's big brown, innocent eyes and his heart broke. How could he say this right now, to a six year old of all people? Jacob took a deep breath and continued. "There was an accident at the building where your mommy works."

Carlos looked worried. "Is she ok? What kind of accident?"

"An airplane hit the building where your mommy works." Jacob couldn't take this much longer; he started to cry. "And…she didn't make it."

"W-what do you mean?" Carlos asked meekly. "Where's my mommy?"

"I'm so sorry honey but your mommy's gone." Jacob told him.

"Gone? Gone where? I want my mommy!" Carlos started to cry. Jacob reached out for him and hugged him tightly.

"Your mommy's an angel now Carlos." Jacob explained in a broken voice.

"I don't want her to be an angel." Carlos sobbed. "I want my mommy here! I want my daddy too! Where's my daddy?"

Jacob's heart broke even more and a fresh wave of tears rolled down his cheeks. "When your daddy heard about out the accident at your mommy's job, he went down there right away to go help her. He ran inside the building to go look for her but…"

"But what?" Carlos croaked. "Is he ok? Did he come out of the building?"

Jacob closed his eyes. "He didn't." he whispered. "He-"

"NO!" Carlos shrieked and tore away from Jacob. "No I want my mommy and daddy! I don't want them to be angels! I want them here with me! I want my mommy and daddy!"

Jacob held Carlos tightly in his arms as the six year old cried and thrashed around. He couldn't imagine a worse fate for anybody. And on their birthday for that matter.

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><p>It had been a few days since Carlos' parents died. They had their funeral, along with the funeral of many others who were killed in the attack on the World Trade Center. At first, Carlos stayed at Officer Taylor's house but one day, Officer Taylor helped him pack up all his things into his tiny suitcase and brought him to a place he had never seen before. "What's this place?" Carlos asked, feeling a little scared.<p>

"It's called St. Vincent's. This is a place for kids like you who don't have mommies and daddies to take care of them." Jacob explained to him, holding his hand as he walked him up to the building. "They all stay in the this building and live together." Jacob knelt down to his level. "Can you read what that sign says?"

Carlos looked at the sign and squinted at it. "F-fam- family," he stuttered. "Is in the h-h-heart."

"That's right." Jacob smiled at him. "And that means if you keep someone in here," he pointed to Carlos's chest. "They'll be there forever because family is forever."

Carlos nodded. "Does this mean the people here will be my family now?"

"If you want them to be." Jacob said. "I'm going to visit you everyday and if you're not happy here, then I'll take you somewhere where you will be happy. But here, you're going to make all kinds of new friends. You're going to meet kids who are just like you and you'll all become one big family. You're going to love them just the same as your loved your mommy and daddy."

Carlos nodded again and took another look at the building before him. His new home was bigger than where he lived with his parents, but it didn't matter how big it was; it didn't fill the hole that formed in his heart the day they died. And despite what Officer Taylor told him, new family wouldn't fill that hole either.

**A/N: this chapter is dedicated to all of those who lost their lives on 9/11. Sleep easy and God bless.**


	2. Logan Mitchell

**A/N: thank you so much to whoever reviewed my first chapter. for a while, I didnt think that anybody was going to review this story :p but you guys proved me wrong and I couldn't be more thankful :) Ok so the beginning of this chapter is in the past, and afterwards it's the present, which is two years after Carlos' chapter took place (not two years exactly, but you get what I mean lol). Enjoy the Logan angst~**

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><p><strong>Chapter Two: Logan<strong>

_Raymond Mitchell was excited. As he paced outside of his wife's hospital room, he couldn't fight the smile on his face. Sure he wanted to be in there with her, but he respected her wishes by letter Joanne have her mother with her. Besides, it just amped up the surprise more. Today, August 15th 1993, was going to be the best day of his life._

_Today, he was going to be a dad._

_Ray couldn't stop smiling whenever he thought about the son he was going to have. They already picked out a name- Logan. Ray knew that his son would be everything he dreamed of- smart, kind, a good person. He couldn't wait to do all the father/son activities with him that he never got to do with his own father, for the elder man left him and his mother when he was very young. Ray was going to give Logan what he never had- a father that loved him._

_The only thing Ray couldn't stand right now was the waiting. He didn't want to keep waiting for the nurse to come out with a wide smile on her face, telling him that his son was born, that he had his sea green eyes and his own sandy blonde hair. Hey, what man didn't want his son to be the splitting image of him?_

_But when the nurse left Joanne's room, she didn't look happy whatsoever. In fact, her kind eyes held unshed tears in them as she approached Ray. "I'm so sorry…" she stared. "But your wife…the delivery was hard on her. She had too much blood loss during and…she isn't going to make it."_

_Ray felt his whole world slow down, like everything around him was happening in slow motion. Even the nurse's voice was coming out in slow motion. All he could hear was her repeating she isn't going to make it over and over in his head. He was in such a state of shock he couldn't even speak. "Would you like to see her now?" the nurse asked. Mutely, Ray nodded and she walked him into his room._

_Seeing Joanne laying in her hospital bed broke his heart. She looked unnaturally pale and completely drained, like just breathing was too much work for her. Tears started to stream down his cheeks as he took her hand in his, holding it tightly and not wanting to let go. She turned her head towards him and managed a weak smile. "Hi." she whispered. Ray sniffled and held her closely. He still couldn't speak; he didn't know what to say. "I'm sorry." she said softly._

_"Don't be." Ray told her immediately. "This isn't your fault."_

_Joanne nodded and placed another hand over top of his. "I love you."_

_"I love you too." he said. She smiled again and her eye lids started to droop shut. Her heart monitor was speeding up and Ray started to cry harder. Then before he knew it, she flat lined. His wife was dead._

_"Mr. Mitchell?" a nurse tapped him on the shoulder. "Would you like to hold your son?"_

_Slowly, Ray detached his hands from Joanne's and turned towards the nurse holding his son in her arms. He didn't answer her, so she took his silence as a yes and she handed him the baby. Ray looked down at the baby in his arms. At a first glance he noticed that he didn't look a thing like him- he looked exactly like his mother. He had the same black hair as her and the same wide brown eyes._

_"You have your mother's eyes." he whispered to Logan. The baby gurgled and nestled himself against his father, falling asleep. Ray couldn't get the image of those eyes out of his head. But he didn't see the warm, loving eyes Logan held; he saw the eyes of a monster that killed his wife._

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><p>At the age of eight, Logan already had it figured out that his dad didn't like him very much. Whenever he was in the room, his dad blatantly disregarded his appearance or yelled at him until he left him alone. He also figured out that he was better being unseen and unheard by his father, for the littlest of things he did would make him mad, resulting in him getting hit. Logan never told anyone about his dad hitting him because the elder man always told him that nobody would believe him. So for years, Logan suffered his dad's abuse and kept the secret all to himself.<p>

Logan wished his mom was alive. She would never let his dad hit him. She would have loved him. Deep down, Logan always thought that his dad really did love him, he was just always tired and cranky from work, and Logan was just a bad boy. Maybe if he was a good boy, his dad would be nice to him…

"Daddy, I'm home." Logan announced one day, walking inside his house, home from school. Ray glanced up from the kitchen table where he was currently typing at his laptop and then looked back down at his work, not responding to Logan. The eight-year-old boy frowned but walked up to his dad anyway. "I made you this." he put the paper on the table next to his dad's laptop. Ray glanced at the drawing Logan had done in school. It was a picture of what he assumed was the two of them. The drawing of Logan had a little speech bubble that said _I love you daddy_. "Do you like it?" Logan asked hopefully, a small smile on his face. Ray replied by simply picking up the paper and moving it out of the way of his laptop. Logan felt his little heart drop. "Daddy-"

"Logan, could you just leave me alone!" Ray snapped, causing his son to flinch. "I'm trying to get work done!"

Logan's eyes filled up with tears. "S-sorry." he quickly ran off to his room, but he didn't even make up all the way upstairs when his father called him back. Timidly, he walked back into the kitchen.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to leave your stuff laying around?" Ray yelled at him, pointing to his book bag, which was resting on the floor by the front door.

"I'm sorry daddy." Logan said in a tiny voice and ran over to pick up his book bag. Ray knelt down and grabbed his son by his short black hair, causing him to cry out in pain. "Daddy, you're hurting me!" he whined, his little hands going up to grab his father's rough hands off of his head. He had no avail.

"Do you have any idea how much you hurt me?" Ray snapped at him. "You killed her- you killed your mother!"

"I- I didn't!" Logan said, starting to cry. "Daddy stop it!"

"Shut up!" Ray threw him to the floor. Logan's body hit the linoleum hard and a rush of agony shot up his spine. Ray whipped off his belt and raised it above his head, bringing it down hard on Logan's body. The little boy screamed and cried as his father repeatedly hit him with the leather belt, leaving welts and bruises on Logan's body.

"No, daddy no, please!" Logan sobbed.

"I told you to shut up!" Ray roared, slashing him once more. "You worthless, pathetic, stupid…" the insults were hurled at Logan as hard as the belt was. After what felt like an eternity, Ray finally stopped hitting him. "Get out of my sight." he snarled at him. "I don't wanna see your face right now." But Logan laid limp on the floor, tears streaming down his cheeks. He was in too much pain to move. "I said," Ray bent down and yanked Logan up to his feet by his hair. "Get out of my sight!" he gave Logan a hard shove towards the stairs and the little boy limped up to his room as fast as he could. However he didn't make it far, for his body was just screaming out in pain, so he laid down on the steps, quietly crying himself to sleep.

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><p>Logan wasn't sure how long he was asleep for but when he heard footsteps coming up the steps behind him, he immediately woke up. "No, no, no." he whimpered and started to crawl upstairs, only to be stopped by a gentle hand on his back. Slowly, the quivering boy turned around to see a police officer kneeling behind him.<p>

"Sweetheart, my name is Grace." she told him in a kind voice. "Can you tell me your name?"

"L-Logan." he said softly. "Am I in trouble?"

"Not at all Logan." Grace told him. "I got a phone call from your neighbor. He said he heard some yelling over here. Did something happen between you and your daddy?"

Logan bit his lip and looked down. "You wont believe me." he whispered.

Grace's brow furred. "What makes you say that?" she asked.

"My daddy told me." Logan said, still whispering. Grace had to strain to hear him.

Grace tenderly reached out to touch him but Logan pinched his eyes shut and flinched away from her hand. Her heart ached at that ands she slowly lowered her hand. "Logan, I'm going to take you somewhere where you can get help." Grace told him. Slowly, Logan opened his eyes and looked at her curiously. She handed Logan a blanket, which he wrapped around his body. "Your daddy can't hurt you where I'm going to take you." Grace continued.

Logan wondered how Grace knew that his dad hit him but he didn't question it after she told him that. Right now, he would go anywhere with her, just so his daddy wouldn't hurt him. "Ok." he whispered and stood up, following Grace outside of his house. Cop cars were parked around his house. Inside one of them, his dad was sitting in the back seat, glaring at the bars before him. Logan didn't look at him for long and he followed Grace to one of her cars. Before he got in, he looked next door. His neighbor, Mrs. Magicowski, was standing outside her car, watching the scene unfold before her, a nervous expression on her face. Logan locked eyes with her and smiled softly before mouthing, "Thank you" at her. Mrs. Magicowski smiled in return and nodded.

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><p>Logan was sitting in the back room of a building that Grace had brought him to. He noticed that the sign outside the building said St. Vincent's and another sign said Family is in the Heart. Logan thought this was a very nice place for him to be.<p>

The door opened and Logan looked up to see a woman and a dog walk inside. The dog ran right up to Logan and started to lick his hand. Logan smiled and petted the dog. The lady who walked in with him put on a pair of latex gloves and sat down across from Logan. "Spot's our mascot." she told him. "He won't let anything bad happen to you." Logan looked up at her and smiled. She smiled in return. "My name is Dr. Collins, and I'm only here to make sure you're ok."

"You're a doctor?" Logan asked in a small voice.

Dr. Collins nodded. "But I also work here at St. Vincent's with Kelly and Gustavo. We're all going to take care of you while you stay here." Logan nodded. "Are you ok with me checking you out right now?" Logan bit his lip but nodded again. "Ok, let's just take a look see here." Dr. Collins started to unbutton Logan's shirt and gently pushed it off of him. His chest was badly bruised. His shoulder had welt marks on it from his father's belt and part of the skin looked burnt. "That must have hurt…" Dr. Collins gently touched Logan's shoulder. Instantly, the memory of his father pressing his cigarette into his shoulder filled his mind and Logan flinched slightly. "Do you wanna tell me about it?" Dr. Collins asked.

Logan bit his lip and looked down at his wringing hands in his lap. "Uh… my daddy hurt me…with his cigarette." he whispered, hoping his father was wrong and Dr. Collins would believe him. She seemed like a nice lady and he didn't want to lie to her. "He said no one would believe me if I tell them." he continued, then hesitantly raised his head to look at Dr. Collins. "Do you believe me?" he asked quietly.

Dr. Collins smiled at him. "I do Logan. And I promise you that your dad is never going to hurt you again."

Logan felt himself relax. Maybe staying here wouldn't be too bad…

**A/N: and this concludes yet another chapter that brought me to tears (mostly because of the "you have your mother's eyes" line I trolled myself with that one :p). What'd you guys think of it? (: and thank you to the first few reviewers I got for chapter one! Love you all! xoxo**


	3. James Diamond

**A/N: and here we have the James Angst chapter. This one takes place around the same time as Logan's did, just so you know. Hope you guys like it :D**

**Chapter Three: James**

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><p>"Ten seconds on the clock, Diamond has the puck, he shoots…" James pulled his hockey stick back and hit the tennis ball with it, sending the ball flying into the trashcan he had been using as a goal for his one man hockey game. "He scores!" James shot his fists up in the air, cheering for his goal and wobbled on his roller skates until he fell backwards on his butt. With a sigh the eight year old boy pushed himself back to his feet and skated down his driveway and to his house. He opened the front door and stuck his head inside. "Mommy, when's daddy going to home play with me?" he asked his mother, who was sitting on their couch, a cup of tea in her hands. She must have not heard him, for she didn't say anything. She just continued to stare at the cup in her hands.<p>

James bit his lip. For the past couple of weeks, his parents had been acting weird around him. They rarely wanted to take him out anywhere, his mom always seemed sad, and his father seemed to be doing nothing but work all the time. James didn't like when his mommy was sad. He also didn't like it when his daddy worked all the time; they never had any time to play together. With a sigh, James skated inside his house, even though it was clearly against the rules for him to skate inside, and he rolled on the wooden floor up to his mother. "Mom!"

Brooke Diamond jumped and placed a hand over her chest. "Oh James. You startled me." she turned to her son and frowned. "Why are you skating in the house? You know you're not allowed to."

"But I was talking to you and you didn't hear me." James said.

"I'm sorry honey." Brooke told her son. "What did you ask me?"

"I said," James paused to take his helmet off. "When's dad gonna come play hockey with me?"

"I'm not sure, why don't you go into his study and ask him." Brooke suggested. James smiled and turned around to skate off to his dad's study. "Hey!" Brooke called after him and James whirled around. "Skates." was all she said and James dropped to the floor, pulling his roller skates off of his feet. He then resumed his quest to his dad's study.

Making sure to knock before he pushed open the door, James walked inside to see his dad sitting at his desk, his phone to his ear. When he noticed James standing in the doorway, he quickly said goodbye to whoever he was talking to and he hung up the phone. "What's up Jay?" he said, rolling his shoulders back to relax himself.

"Can you come play hockey with me?" James asked, walking over to his dad's desk and leaning against it.

"Yeah, I was just about to head on out there." Brian Diamond said to his son.

"Yay!" James cheered, jumping up and down.

Brian smiled and ruffled his son's hair. "Jay, I have something for you." he said.

"You do?" James asked, smiling wider. He loved getting presents.

"Yes, and it's very special." Brian unclasped the necklace from around his neck and placed it in James's hand. The brunette boy's eyes widened. This necklace was his dad's favorite thing in the world. James examined it carefully. He had seen his dad wear it all the time. It was a gold chair with a charm at the end which was a triangle with an eyeball in it. It was the same symbol that was on the dollar bill. James remembered his dad describing it as the all seeing eye.

"You're giving this to me?" James asked softly.

Brian nodded. "I think you're old enough to have it now. Do you remember the story I told you about it?" James shook his head no. "Well this necklace was passed down to me from my father, who it was given to from his father. It's very old and it means a lot to our family." Brian pointed to the eye. "This is called the all seeing eye. It represents God watching over humankind, but when you wear it, it means that I'll always be watching over you."

James smiled and hugged the necklace to his chest. "I promise I'll take good care of it daddy." he swore. "I'm gonna go put it up in my room so I don't break it when we play hockey." he turned to leave but his dad grabbed his arm and pulled him into a quick hug.

"I love you Jay." he said softly.

"I love you too daddy." when his father released him, James ran out of his study and back into the living room where his mom was. "Mom, look what daddy gave me." he showed his mother the necklace.

Brooke smiled. "That's great honey." she bent down to give him a hug, similar to the one his dad had given to him only seconds ago. James was a bit confused but hugged his mother back regardless. "I love you James." Brooke said in his ear.

James pulled back and kissed his mom's cheek. "I love you too ma." he said. "I'm gonna go put daddy's necklace in my room." Brooke nodded and James's tiny form retreated up to his room. When he was out of view, Brooke covered her face with her hands and silently wept.

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><p>After James was sure his necklace was secure on his nightstand, he started back downstairs. "Dad, are you ready to play?" he called to his father as he walked downstairs.<p>

Brian left his study and walked up to him. "Yeah bud but could you do me a favor first?" he asked.

James shrugged. "Sure, what?"

He handed James some money. "Could you run to the corner store to get some milk?" he asked.

James raised an eyebrow. "By myself?" he asked, skeptically. "Are you sure?"

"You go to that store all the time." Brian said. "You even go by yourself sometimes. It shouldn't be that big a deal."

James smiled. "Ok daddy." he pocketed the money and ran out of the house, calling goodbye over his shoulder.

Brian watched his son sadly. "Bye James," he whispered when the door shut.

Brooke walked down the steps and into the living room, carrying their suitcases. Mascara was running down her cheeks. "Is he gone?" she asked.

Brian nodded and took his suitcase from her. "Let's hurry before he gets back." he told him and the two of them walked out of their house, and out of James's life forever.

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><p>James pushed open the front door to his house and walked back inside. "Mom, dad, I'm home!" he called out. His voice echoed throughout the house and he looked around to see that his house looked surprisingly empty. "Mom? Dad?" he put down the grocery bag and walked around the downstairs of his house. His parents were no where to be seen. Re-entering the living room, he saw that his dad's car keys weren't hanging on the hook like they were when he left. Feeling confused, he ran over to the window and looked out to see that his parent's car wasn't in the driveway.<p>

James was getting worried. Why weren't his parents here? How could they leave while he was gone? He picked up the phone to call them but both of their phones went straight to voicemail. His breath was starting to come out uneven. Where were his parents?

He dropped the phone and ran upstairs to their bedroom. His parents bed was made and the room looked eerily clean. James was confused and ran over to his mother's closet, pulling it open only to be greeted by emptiness. The same with his father's closet, and their drawers… even their suitcases were gone…

Realization hit James harder than anything ever hit him before and he honestly felt the wind being knocked out of him. "No." James whispered, shaking his head. It couldn't be true. His parents would leave him- they loved him! "No!" James ran from his parents room and back downstairs. His sneakers hitting against the wood were loud and just reminding him that he was truly alone in his house. "Mommy! Daddy!" he shouted, hoping that they would answer him. But when he got no reply, he just started feeling more and more distressed. "Mommy! Daddy!" James pushed open the front door and ran outside. "Mommy, daddy!" he screamed, running around his house. Tears started to fall down his cheeks as he continued to scream for his parents. He must have done at least ten laps around his house, to the end of his driveway, even down the street. When night finally came, sat down on his front step, exhausted and holding his head as he cried. How could his parents just leave him?

He heard footsteps and his head immediately shot up, thinking it was his parents. But it was only a man he had never seen before. The man knelt down to his level. "Are you ok, little boy?"

James sniffled. "I can't find my parents." he whimpered, new tears spilling out of his eyes. The man looked sad and he ran a tender hand through James's hair. "I- I just came home and they weren't here." James continued to explain, fighting to sound coherent through his tears. "I-I think they left me."

The man sighed. "Can I tell you something kid?" he asked. James nodded his head and wiped his eyes. "I don't think your parents are coming back." he said gently.

James' eyes widened. "Wh-why would you say that?" he demanded. "You don't know anything, my mommy and daddy love me- they wouldn't just leave me!"

"Your parents did love you, but they had to go away for a little while." the man explained calmly. "You have to believe me-"

"I don't even know you!" James insisted.

"I know but I'm a friend of your dads." the man said. James froze and looked at him curiously. "So you can trust me. Let me take you somewhere they can take care of you until your parents come back for you."

James sniffled and after a few moments of consideration, he whispered, "Ok." he let the man take his hand and walk him to his car to take him to the place he was talking about. "They didn't even say goodbye." James whispered softly to himself as they drove away.

* * *

><p>The man brought James to a placed called St. Vincent's. Since James had lived in New York for his entire life, he recognized the place before. He remembered one of his friends told him that it was something called a group home. James didn't really know what a group home is but when he got there, he realized that a lot of kids stayed there. "Do all these kids live here?" James asked the man, who's name ended up being Mr. Griffin. He told him that, along with how he knew his father on the car ride over here. He answered any and all of James's questions except for where his parents went. All he could tell him was that he knew his parents left, but he wouldn't say where; he claimed he didn't know that. James wasn't satisfied with his answer but Mr. Griffin proved to be someone he could trust.<p>

"Yeah, all of them don't have parents to take care of them." Mr. Griffin explained.

James frowned. "Like me." he said sadly, and his eyes started to fill up with tears.

Mr. Griffin knelt down ant his level and put two hands on his shoulders. "It's going to be ok James." he told him. "You're really going to like it here. These people are going to take real good care of you and you're going to make all kinds of friends. Then one day, when your mom and dad come back from their…vacation, they're going to take you back home."

James wiped his eyes and nodded. Before he could respond, two boys who looked about his age ran up to him. "Are you the new kid?" the Latino boy asked. James nodded slowly. "Hi!" he waved to him happily. "I'm Carlos and this is Logan. We live here too."

"You're gonna like it here." Logan smiled. "It's really cool here!"

"And the three of us are gonna be bestest friends!" Carlos added.

James gave a small smile. But even though Mr. Griffin's and Carlos' and Logan's words were reassuring, he still couldn't ignore the feeling in the pit of his stomach that told him his parents weren't going to come back.

**A/N: poor James ): only one more BTR boy to go! Thanks so much for all the feedback I've been getting. I love you guys :D**


	4. Kendall Knight

**A/N: ok so it's been eight years since James' chapter and now it's time for some Kendall Angst! The next chapter is going to be a continuation of where his leaves off and then the story's going to pick up with all four of the boys. And without further ado, here's chapter four :D**

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><p><strong>Chapter Four: Kendall<strong>

_'It hurts' _he thought miserably, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to block out the agonizing burning pain that filled his body. _'Please just stop, please. It hurts so bad'_

But he didn't stop. He never stopped. That's why Kendall stopped begging for him to stop after a while. It wasn't like he would listen anyway. Every now and again he would let out a cry of pain but it was like he didn't even hear it. Did he just not care that he was causing his stepson so much pain?

When it finally ended and he pulled out of him, Peter rolled him over so he was laying on his back. The sixteen year old trembled under his gaze and a few tears leaked out of his eyes. He wanted to tell him to get off of him, to leave him alone… but he just couldn't find the words. He wasn't sure if it was out of fear or the fact that was slowly giving up on talking because nobody listened anyway, but he couldn't find the words he wanted to say and it was killing him. Peter leaned down close to him and Kendall shrunk back into the sheets, trying to scurry away until the elder man stopped him by running his fingers through his hair. Kendall let out a shaky breath and raised his hands to push him off but Peter moved back before he could even make contact. "You were so good tonight." the man breathed in his ear, making Kendall squirm. He didn't want to hear this. He didn't want his stepfather to tell him he was good in bed- that was sick and disturbing. Kendall whimpered and writhed around under his step dad's grasp; the sadistic man had him pinned down to the bed. Peter placed his mouth on Kendall's, giving him a kiss and Kendall felt his stomach churn. He wanted to throw up right now, even worse than before.

Peter finally climbed off of him and started out of the room. Kendall pulled the blanket all the way up to his chin, covering his naked body. Still shaking and crying, he glanced at the door, making sure Peter was really gone. When he was sure he was, he finally breathed a sigh of relief, even though he didn't feel at all relieved. The memories still lingered in his mind no matter what he did.

It all started when he younger. He never knew his father; he left when he was too young to form any memories of him. For a while it was just him and his mother, who wasn't all too kind to him. Jennifer Knight had a more than hard time dealing with her husband leaving her. Sure they were young and they had a baby, but she thought he loved her. Turns out she was wrong, since he did leave and she was left to raise a two year old son by herself. She had no clue what she was doing and eventually turned to alcohol for support. She spent most of her nights completely hammered, not remembering a single thing the next day. But Kendall remembered. He remember how his mother touched him in a way that mothers shouldn't touch their children. It sickened him every time he thought about it.

Kendall was ten when his mom met Peter and at first he thought it was a blessing in disguise. When she was with him she seemed happier, and she even stopped drinking. But when he moved in, things took a toll for the worse. Peter decided to make Kendall his little play thing. It started off with touching, just like his mom had done for him but after a while, it resorted to just plain sexual abuse.

The first time Peter raped Kendall, he was eleven. He never thought he could experience a kind of pain like that. And it didn't just hurt- it burned. It burned with agony and the memory was burned in his mind.

Peter also had a daughter- Kendall's step sister Katie. To Peter and Jen, she was unspoiled perfection. She could get away with everything and anything she did was Kendall's fault, which usually left him being punished by Peter.

Now at sixteen, Kendall's life wasn't much different now. He was still being abused by his stepfather; the only thing different now was that he did a lot less talking than be did when he was eleven. When he was younger he tried telling his mom about what Peter did to him, but she just wouldn't have it. "Peter's so good to us." she would tell him. "He got us a better house, more money. He's the father you never had. And he makes me so happy. Let's not ruin that Kendall." Kendall's heart broke when his mom told him that. He tried to tell Katie, but she refused to believe anything bad about her father. "You were just getting what you deserved." she told him.

He truly had nobody on his side.

Although his abuse wasn't everyday, Kendall hurt everyday. He was in physical and mental agony and the worst part was that nobody cared. And all he wanted was to be loved.

After a couple of minutes passed and Kendall felt a little better than before (by 'better' he meant, able to walk without wanting to cry) he wrapped the blanket around his body and got out of Peter's bed. He peeked his head out into the hallway and looked around, making sure that nobody was out there, and when the coast was cleared he ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Just to be safe, he moved the clothes hamper in front of it to work as a block. He dropped the blanket to the floor and stared at himself in the mirror for a moment. He looked down at his hips and gingerly touched at them. They were covered in pressure marks, bruises, and hand shaped prints from when Peter forced him down on the bed. Kendall shook his head, not wanting to think about it anymore and got into the shower, turning the warm spray of water onto himself. He grabbed the soap and started to scrub himself. Desperate to feel clean again, he rubbed his skin raw. After almost an hour, Kendall ceased his excessive cleaning and just stood there, watching as soap, blood, water, and tears all flowed down the drain. Dejected, Kendall stepped out of the shower and wrapped himself in a towel. Physically, he was clean but mentally, he really wasn't. He never was.

* * *

><p>Kendall was walking down the hallway, still donning nothing but the towel around his waist, when he felt a hand on his shoulder. The blonde boy spun around in shock, his eyes wide, and he took a few steps back. That was the worst part about everything he had been though- he couldn't stand being touched by anyone. It just freaked him out.<p>

"Kendall," Peter said to him. "Your mom and I are going out for a couple of hours, ok? We'll be back later." Kendall couldn't say anything. He just let out ragged, nervous breaths. "You hear me, boy?" Peter took a step towards him and Kendall let out a whimper, nodding rapidly. "Alright then. See you later." Peter went downstairs and Kendall went into his bedroom.

He leaned against the door, trying to control his breathing. _'Just relax. He's leaving. It's ok now' _he told himself. Kendall ran a hand through his hair and proceeded to get dressed. After putting on his favorite plaid shirt, a pair of jeans, Vans, and his favorite gray beanie, he went outside to go get the mail, since nobody else probably did. Once he stepped outside, he noticed a colorful piece of paper on the ground. Curiously, he picked it up and looked it over. The paper turned out to be an advertisement of sorts, asking for donations to a placed called St. Vincent's. Kendall turned the paper over and looked over the back of it, reading about how St. Vincent's had been helping children who couldn't stay in their homes or didn't have parents to take care of them for years. Currently, it was run three people: Kelly Wainwright, Gustavo Rocque, and Dr. Tara Collins. Anyone who needed help was allowed there, the paper said.

And that's how Kendall got the idea.

* * *

><p>Kendall looked up from the paper once more, staring at the building before him. It looked just like it did in the picture. His decision was made; this was where he had to be. Adjusting the back pack on his back, he opened the door of St. Vincent's and walked inside. He looked around, seeing kids running around, playing together. Sitting on the staircase were three boys who looked to be his age. They all looked at him when he walked in and Kendal lowered his head.<p>

"Hi!" a cheerful voice said, causing Kendall took look up. He recognized her as Kelly Wainwright, the same girl on the paper he was currently clutching in his hands. "My name is Kelly, I help run things here at St. Vincent's. How can I help you?" Kendall opened his mouth, he wanted to tell Kelly everything he was going through but he couldn't get the words out. Kelly's smile faded. "Sweetheart, is everything ok?" she reached out to touch him and Kendal backed away from her, looking even more nervous than before. "Can you tell me what's wrong?" Kelly asked gently.

Kendall licked his lips, then swallowed. "It hurts." he said in a quiet voice that Kelly had to strain to hear. "He hurts me… I can't stay there anymore."

Kelly nodded. "Ok, honey, just come with me and we'll work everything out."

"A-are you going to make me go back?" Kendall asked timidly before she could turn around to walk away.

Kelly looked at him, a sad look in her eyes. "No." she said finally. "I won't make you do anything you don't want to do."

And for the first time, Kendall truly felt at ease.

**A/N: and now we have Kendall, the final addition to St. Vincent's. funny, he was also the last addition to BTR. Haha oh the irony. Ugh I used agony like 500 times in this ): But anyways, I hope you guys liked this chapter! (:**


	5. I Could Really Use A Wish Right Now

**A/N: this chapter (as for the rest of the story) is a continuation of where we left off in Kendall's chapter. hope you all like this :)**

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><p><strong>Chapter Five: I Could Really Use A Wish Right Now<strong>

"I heard he doesn't talk." Carlos said, leaning across the table, over the pieces of construction paper that they were supposed to be painting on. Currently, the boys and some of the other kids were in a type of group therapy that Kelly used, which was painting. She thought that art was an easier way for them to express how they were feeling, rather than just talking about it. But rather than painting, Carlos and his two best friends Logan and James found themselves more interested in the new kid.

"I heard he's been with Collins since he got here." Logan added.

"I heard that you three gossip more than little old ladies playing bingo." Kelly said, kneeling by their table. James, Logan, and Carlos all exchanged sheepish expressions before looking down at the table. "You guys know it isn't nice to talk about someone behind their back." Kelly chided.

"But we weren't gossiping." James insisted. "We were… conversing."

"Well how about instead of _gossiping_," Kelly said and James rolled his eyes. "You use some of those colors you've mixed to paint a picture."

"Do they pay you by the number of pictures us kids paint?" James asked.

"Didn't you paint for your last art instructor?" Kelly shot back.

"You're not an art instructor; you're a therapist." James said, a condescending look on his face. Kelly gave him an eyebrows raised, head cocked look, but James just shrugged and looked back down at his paper.

"So can you tell us about the new kid?" Carlos asked Kelly. "What's his story?"

"You know I'm not gonna answer that question." Kelly told him.

"What's the big deal?" Carlos asked with a small pout.

"Well how would you like it if I talked about you with the other kids?" Kelly replied. Carlos sighed, knowing Kelly was right and leaned back in his seat.

"Well can you tell us his name at least?" Logan asked.

Kelly sighed. She had never met three more- for lack of a better term- curious teenage boys in her life. "It's Kendall." she said. "And that's all I'm saying. Anything else you want to know, you talk to him."

"So that means he does talk?" Carlos asked.

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Can't you three for once just paint your pictures like good boys?" she asked, a tired smile on her face.

"I have nothing to paint." James replied. "Or say, for that matter." and without another word, he got up from his seat and walked out.

Kelly sighed and rubbed her temples. James Diamond was one of the more difficult kids here. He never wanted to talk about how he was feeling, making one on one therapy sessions with him completely difficult, as well as activities like this. Kelly wasn't sure if it was because he was hiding something, or because he just didn't want to open up but for the past eight years, you'd think she'd be used to it by now.

"Sorry about him." Carlos said sheepishly. "He hasn't been having the best day for whatever reason. I'll go talk to him." Carlos excused himself from the table and went after James.

Logan turned to Kelly. "I'm almost finished my picture." he said, hoping it would cheer her up that at least one of them followed her instructions. Kelly smiled at him and Logan swirled his paint brush around in the green paint. "So about the new kid…"

"Not you too Logie." Kelly groaned.

Logan chuckled. "I'm just curious. I mean, I heard he doesn't talk to anyone, and that's just kinda creepy. And creepy around here is saying something." he added in a whisper. Kelly rolled her eyes and Logan turned his attention to the paintbrush he was still swirling around in the cup of paint. "I bet he got beat up a lot at home." he said, his eyebrows furring together. Kelly stared at him wordlessly. "I bet… his dad was mad at him a lot." he continued, his voice getting lower. "I bet he beat him with the belt until he couldn't move anymore." Logan shook his head, snapping him out of those thoughts, and looked around the table. "Is there more yellow paint?" he asked Kelly.

"Yeah, it's over on the counter." Kelly said softly.

Logan smiled at her and got up to get the paint. Kelly stared after him, wondering how someone could hurt a sweet boy like Logan.

* * *

><p>Gustavo Rocque was a nice man, but he was big and intimidating. Honestly, he scared Kendall a little bit when he came to pick him up from Dr. Collins office, which also frightened him for she couldn't do a proper inspection without touching him. But he managed to make it through the whole ordeal without completely breaking down and now Gustavo was walking him to his room. "You're going to have three roommates." Gustavo told him as they walked down the hall. "They're nice boys. A little crazy but you get used to it after a while."<p>

Kendall nodded, not really replying to anything he was saying. He was still struggling with the will to speak. He had been going so long would really talking to anyone, give or take mumbling a few words. Now he was in a new environment where he didn't know anyone but he had to try to talk to them. They weren't going to hurt him, Kelly told him so herself. So did Dr. Collins and Gustavo. He just had to get used to that idea.

"Here we are." Gustavo announced, pushing open the door to Kendall's new bedroom. Inside, three boys were running around. Two of them were throwing something in the air- it looked like a comb- and the third boy was trying to retrieve it. "Hey, guys, tone it down for a second." Gustavo told them. The boys settled down and looked at Gustavo and Kendall. "Boys, this is Kendall, he's going to be your new roommate."

"Hi." Kendall said in a quiet voice.

"He does talk." the shortest boy whispered to his friends and Kendall blushed faintly. Word had already gotten out about how much of a freak hew was. Great.

"Carlos!" the pale, black haired boy hissed and nudged 'Carlos' in his ribs.

"Anyway…" Gustavo said loudly, causing all four of them to jump. "Kendall, this is James, Carlos, and Logan." each of the boys waved when Gustavo said their name so Kendall could acknowledge who was who. "I hope you boys will make him feel right at home." he added.

"You know we will Gustavo." Carlos smiled and Kendall relaxed. He seemed nice.

"Alright, then I'll leave you boys to it." Gustavo smiled and turned to leave.

"Hey, Gustavo." James jumped off of his bed and rushed over to the doorway. "D-did the mail come today."

Gustavo hesitated. "Yeah it did." he finally said.

"Did I get anything?" James asked hopefully.

Gustavo sighed. "Sorry James…not today."

James sighed and nodded, turning back to his bed and flopping down on it. Gustavo let out another pained sigh; it killed him whenever he saw how hopeful James would get, thinking his parents contacted him, and then how sad he looked when he found out that they didn't. Quietly, he shut the boys' bedroom door, leaving Kendall alone with his new roommates. Kendall took a seat in the bed next to James's and James turned his head towards him and offered a smile. "Hey." he said softly.

Kendall smiled in return but didn't offer and verbal greetings.

Carlos jumped over on James's bed, making the brunette boy bounce a bit. "You don't have to be afraid." Carlos told him. "You're gonna like it here."

Kendall just bit his lip and stared at the floor, only to look up when he felt Logan go sit next to him. "Don't mind Carlos." he said. "He's just very blunt."

"Better than beating around the bush." Carlos shot back.

Logan rolled his eyes. "But he is right. You are gonna like it here."

"And the four of us are going to be the best of friends." Carlos added, a wide smile on his face. Kendall felt a little more at ease whenever he saw how happy Carlos was and managed a small smile in return.

"So what do you think of this place?" James asked. Kendall shrugged and looked around the room. James, Logan, and Carlos all exchanged a glance. What was it going to take to get this kid to talk? "Uh…" James tried again and Kendall turned to look at him. "How old are you?" he tried.

Kendall hesitated. "S-sixteen." he stuttered in a quiet voice.

"Cool, so are we." Logan said.

"I'm turning seventeen in September." Carlos said with a smirk. Kendall nodded, and another silence filled the room.

James reached for Carlos's arm, flipping it around to look at his watch, and then said, "I think it's time for dinner." he said.

"Ooh, and it's fish stick Friday!" Carlos said happily. "With tots! C'mon Logie!" he leaped off of James's bed and grabbed Logan's arm, dragging him out of the room with him.

James chuckled and shook his head, getting off of the bed. "You get used to that." he told Kendall as he stood up as well. "Carlos has never-ending energy." the brunette paused in thought. "Except when he's asleep, then he's pretty calm." he said and Kendall chuckled softly. James smiled at that. "Well, c'mon. Let's get some fish sticks." he reached out to put his arm around Kendall and the blonde boy immediately backed away from him, looking scared. James started at him confused, and Kendall looked down sheepishly and mumbled an almost inaudible "Sorry."

James raised an eyebrow but smiled at Kendall. "You don't have to be." he told him. "One thing I learned about staying here- you never have feel like you need to say sorry anymore." Kendall visibly relaxed when James said that and the two boys went down to the dining room for dinner.

* * *

><p>"Hey guys!" a voice whispered. Kendall scrunched his face together and nestled deeper under his covers. "Guys!" the voice whispered again. James pulled his pillow over his head. "Guysssss!" the voice was no longer whispering. Logan rolled over and buried his face in his mattress. All three of the boys let out startled cries when they felt something jump onto their beds.<p>

"Carlos, what is your problem?" James groaned, sitting up in his bed and turning on the lamp. Kendall threw his covers off of him and sat up in his bed, watching the scene curiously.

"We gotta go outside now!" Carlos cried, bouncing up and down on his own bed.

"We're not allowed to." Logan said. "It's past curfew."

"But there's shooting stars!" Carlos insisted. "There's millions of them! And millions of wishes need to be made so let's go!"

"We're never gonna make it out the front door." James said with an eye roll.

Carlos considered this. "So we'll go on the roof!" he exclaimed. "C'mon, let's go!"

"The roof?" Logan asked incredulously. "What if we fall off?"

"Then I'll embrace my cat like reflexes so I land on my feet!" Carlos said as if it were obvious and then ran over to the window, opening it and then climbing out.

"What the- Carlos, wait for me." James jumped out of his bed and ran after Carlos. He paused at the window and turned around. "You two are coming right?" he asked Kendall and Logan.

Logan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah." he threw his covers off and got out of his bed. Kendall followed his lead. It took a few minutes but the four boys were laying on the roof, watching the stars in the sky. They all laid there in silence, just watching the stars fall from the sky.

"Did you make your wish?" Carlos asked quietly.

James nodded. "I wished my mom and dad never left me." he said quietly.

"I wished I met my mom." Logan whispered.

Carlos closed his eyes. "I wish my mom and dad were still alive."

A moment of silence passed and all three of the boys were startled when Kendall whispered, "I wished my parents loved me."

**A/N: Kendall speaks! All is right with the world :D so this chapter was kinda ehhh in my opinion :p but I wanna know what you all thought :D review perhaps and tell me?**


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